Trubus

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“My time is short and my patience is even shorter, what is on your mind, kid, and be quick about it.”

A Q&A about Wolf O’Shaw. Ask him about anything, NSFW are to be directed to PMs as this is suppose to be a fun thread to bother Wolf. If I find it inappropriate it will not be answered here and the question will be removed. Forum rules apply, will answer hate on Wolf so no need to be nice.

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29 minutes ago, White In Sky said:

"Cute." - Day

Wolf blows a cloud of smoke out and growls at.

”Don’t insult me by calling me cute. That is also not a question.”

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Esteemed Mr. Shaw Mr. O'Shaw Mr. Shaw,

It has recently come to my attention that the Trurl's legal division has had a series of reports filed about you that were never followed through after being deemed as "frivolous", "superfluous" and, on at least one occasion, "idiotic beyond all measure". Thankfully, being the resourceful, dashing rogue that I am, I managed to "acquire" these reports and give them a thorough read. I was left with a single, burning question, something I absolutely must know:

Why do you flex if you have no muscles?

Best wishes and a continuation of a great day.

Sincerely,

- Communications Officer Jenkins O'Hara

PS: If you lick your microphone with it on again, I swear to all that's good and holy that I'm going to fire a fucking damn BSA shell at you, insurance premiums be damned.

Edited by TullyBBurnalot

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Hello Mr. Wolf O'shaw

There are recent allegations you have allotted station funds to what some have called "insane" amount of protein shake powder and some rumors have spread that you may use some performance enhancing drugs. Do you have any remarks on this situation?

I would be open to an interview if you feel the need to respond on camera however an E-Mail works as well

Doug Rigby
NT-TV News network 5

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1 hour ago, TullyBBurnalot said:

Esteemed Mr. Shaw Mr. O'Shaw Mr. Shaw,

It has recently come to my attention that the Trurl's legal division has had a series of reports filed about you that were never followed through after being deemed as "frivolous", "superfluous" and, on at least one occasion, "idiotic beyond all measure". Thankfully, being the resourceful, dashing rogue that I am, I managed to "acquire" these reports and give them a thorough read. I was left with a single, burning question, something I absolutely must know:

Why do you flex if you have no muscles?

Best wishes and a continuation of a great day.

Sincerely,

- Communications Officer Jenkins O'Hara

PS: If you lick your microphone with it on again, I swear to all that's good and holy that I'm going to fire a fucking damn BSA shell at you, insurance premiums be damned.

Attn: Communications Officer...O’Hara

 

Trurl legal division is a joke and I am pretty sure the employees there are actual clowns. The reports regarding myself are lies, slanders and made up. No idea why you would waste my time on false accusations.

If you met me in person, and not hiding in that dark hole you call a company, you would realize I could bench press you easily with one arm behind my back. As for the flexing, it is clearly a tease. Unlike you, crew like to stare at me. I can’t help how damn amazing I am, and I like making them go red is just icing on the cake.

Regards,

W. O’Shaw.

 

P.S. Microphone is my business and I will choose to annoy the crew with it. Can’t have them have a good day. Also, with you at the trigger, I should be good since you have bad aim.

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3 minutes ago, Taac said:

Hello Mr. Wolf O'shaw

There are recent allegations you have allotted station funds to what some have called "insane" amount of protein shake powder and some rumors have spread that you may use some performance enhancing drugs. Do you have any remarks on this situation?

I would be open to an interview if you feel the need to respond on camera however an E-Mail works as well

Doug Rigby
NT-TV News network 5

“Whom ever decided to give you false claims are obviously jealous of me. I deny claims regarding the use of performance enhancing drugs, as I am powerful enough without it, and I will not hesitate to prove it.”

*Cracks knuckles*
Wolf left no comment regarding the allotted station funds.

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7 hours ago, Trubus said:

Attn: Communications Officer...O’Hara

 

Trurl legal division is a joke and I am pretty sure the employees there are actual clowns. The reports regarding myself are lies, slanders and made up. No idea why you would waste my time on false accusations.

If you met me in person, and not hiding in that dark hole you call a company, you would realize I could bench press you easily with one arm behind my back. As for the flexing, it is clearly a tease. Unlike you, crew like to stare at me. I can’t help how damn amazing I am, and I like making them go red is just icing on the cake.

Regards,

W. O’Shaw.

 

Mr O'Shaw,

 

What is wrong with clowns being hired? Are they not also deserving of jobs and employment? Are you a mime-sympathizer? Have we not earned the respect of the crew?

I dream of a day where crew are judged not for the font in which they speak, but by the quality of their character.

Are you strong enough to bench press your internalized misclowngany, and to lift the oppressed masses up? Do you in fact, even lift?

Honkingly,

Charles V Squigglesworth, Esq.

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Greetings,Mr Shaw

Having your person to serve as a captain is certainly something special and strange, to say the least, having to serve you a pie made of my own Unathi kin and human meat is a horrifying experience, but I wanted to free the HoS’s time by doing the "delivery" ....

Not long after I discovered that the chief was asking for a person I know to bring in Unathi corpses for cooking, discovered this at the same time that my friend was a cannibal, that was bringing in the corpses, so first question

 

Are you the one ordering those meals made from my own kind ?

 

Second thing, many crew members have spoken of you to me as a childish, foolish Man-child,perhaps the excessive licking of the microphone might have been the final straw, your "flexing" and annoyance of the crew might have added to this...opinion of you

and with all due respect I have for you,Mr Shaw,I find myself sadly agreeing to them

so second question

Are you planning on changing your manners to those of a worthy Captain,Mr Shaw ?

 

Sincerely- 

Security Officer,Azer-Kani Unako 

 

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Dear Wolf,

Feck off.

Yours sincerely,

Rsik.

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Sup, Welf Mo'shew.

Recently we have had a lot of new cadets in security, any advise you want to give to our new trainees?

Also put a shirt on you cunt.

-Azul.

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On 8/2/2019 at 1:45 AM, necaladun said:

 

Mr O'Shaw,

 

What is wrong with clowns being hired? Are they not also deserving of jobs and employment? Are you a mime-sympathizer? Have we not earned the respect of the crew?

I dream of a day where crew are judged not for the font in which they speak, but by the quality of their character.

Are you strong enough to bench press your internalized misclowngany, and to lift the oppressed masses up? Do you in fact, even lift?

Honkingly,

Charles V Squigglesworth, Esq.

Wolf would blankly stare at the fax in front of him, frowning, for five minutes before grabbing a slip of paper. Grabbing the pen which balanced on top of his head and ear, he wrote:

Squiggleworth @necaladun;

Not all banana cream pies are going to be great, they are well suited else where. Mimes and clowns are the same, except for one detail...one is noisy while the other is silent. As much as I like my silence, I can't have my back turned from them for too long before they decide to put me in an invisible box. Clowns and Mimes will never earn my respect with their childish pranks like of yours in the legal department.

Wolf would growl at himself, hating the fact he had to talk to clowns of all people.

I could bench press a clown, but my ...internalized misclowngany...will never go away.

I do lift.

Regards;

W. O'Shaw

Wolf jams the paper into the fax machine and presses send before lighting up another cigarette.

Edited by Trubus
Tagging since thread reopen.

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On 8/2/2019 at 4:00 AM, Tristan said:

Greetings,Mr Shaw

Having your person to serve as a captain is certainly something special and strange, to say the least, having to serve you a pie made of my own Unathi kin and human meat is a horrifying experience, but I wanted to free the HoS’s time by doing the "delivery" ....

Not long after I discovered that the chief was asking for a person I know to bring in Unathi corpses for cooking, discovered this at the same time that my friend was a cannibal, that was bringing in the corpses, so first question

 

Are you the one ordering those meals made from my own kind ?

 

Second thing, many crew members have spoken of you to me as a childish, foolish Man-child,perhaps the excessive licking of the microphone might have been the final straw, your "flexing" and annoyance of the crew might have added to this...opinion of you

and with all due respect I have for you,Mr Shaw,I find myself sadly agreeing to them

so second question

Are you planning on changing your manners to those of a worthy Captain,Mr Shaw ?

 

Sincerely- 

Security Officer,Azer-Kani Unako 

 

A loud laugh could be heard coming from Wolf's office.

Officer Unako @Tristan

It was a pleasure working with you that shift. Being served the same meal each day at that cheap welfare station NanoTrasen calls Cyberaid, everything starts tasting bland. Eating human, especially the more angry ones, will always leave a salty taste in my mouth. Guess that is just humans are. When I was offered Ash Drake to eat, I could not pass up the chance. Their brain was transferred to a cyborg to my knowledge and the head of security, Azul, asked what to do with it. I wanted a meat sandwich. That being said, and Ash Drake's meat was tough and slightly spicy, as I thought it would be. I would eat again if given a chance. However. I do not normally eat Unathi, it is normally just human, pig, cow, goat meat, so no, I don't order meals of your own kind.

As for the rumors regarding me, are all false. What you are hearing are jealous opinions of your friends and coworkers regarding how truly amazing I really am. A body and face this good, gets a lot of people blushing and not many people can pull that off, unless you are me. I don't normally lick my microphone, but during my human, unathi sandwich, there was crumbs and bits on the microphone, I couldn't have that go to waste. I suggest thinking for yourself and generate your own opinion of me instead of going based what you heard. It will make you look better and have you look good in my books.

Regards;

W. O'Shaw

Edited by Trubus
Tagging since thread reopen.

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On 8/2/2019 at 5:48 AM, Xyd said:

Dear Wolf,

Feck off.

Yours sincerely,

Rsik.

Dearest Rsik; @Xyd

Are you free tonight?

Ever yours; 

Wolf

Edited by Trubus
Tagging since thread reopen.
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On 8/2/2019 at 8:13 AM, Gaty said:

Sup, Welf Mo'shew.

Recently we have had a lot of new cadets in security, any advise you want to give to our new trainees?

Also put a shirt on you cunt.

-Azul.

Azul; @Gaty

Read up in Standard of Procedures regarding Legal, Green, Blue and Red Alert.

Also, fuck you, not happening.

- Wolf

Edited by Trubus
Tagging since thread reopen.
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My office is open once more.

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Mr. Wolf, 

During my time listening to the comm channels, I couldn't help but notice your fascination with A fellow Unathi named Rsik. I have noticed many interactions between the two of you, and... If i'm not overstepping my bounds here... I would like to know the details behind... how to put it... Your "One-sided" relationship with Rsik. How long has it been going on? What makes the relationship so important to you? Does Rsik's disinterest bother you at all? These are all questions both myself, and the station as a whole are very eager to hear the answers to!

-Sincerely, 
Srusu Rskuzu

 

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16 hours ago, CheekyCrenando said:

Mr. Wolf, 

During my time listening to the comm channels, I couldn't help but notice your fascination with A fellow Unathi named Rsik. I have noticed many interactions between the two of you, and... If i'm not overstepping my bounds here... I would like to know the details behind... how to put it... Your "One-sided" relationship with Rsik. How long has it been going on? What makes the relationship so important to you? Does Rsik's disinterest bother you at all? These are all questions both myself, and the station as a whole are very eager to hear the answers to!

-Sincerely, 
Srusu Rskuzu

 

Rskuzu.

This is nothing more then harmless teasing. This started back before you were enlisted on Cyberaid. They way Rsik reacts to me is oh so adorable, fuels me for the rest of the day. Disinterest from Rsik is a false claim, but I won’t go into details.

- W.

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Dear Wolf

Its your favorite Blueshield Matthew Briggs, i have a question for you: why do you not like the black lipstick? every other captain accepts it.

 

Sincerely, Matthew B.

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On 8/28/2019 at 9:47 AM, Reschreiter1311 said:

Dear Wolf

Its your favorite Blueshield Matthew Briggs, i have a question for you: why do you not like the black lipstick? every other captain accepts it.

 

Sincerely, Matthew B.

Briggs.

I could care less what other captains accept or do not accept. If you come at me with any kind of makeup, I will promise you that I’ll shove it where the sun don’t shine.

- W

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